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Under the Baobab Tree Under the Baobab Tree: March 2007

Saturday, March 31, 2007

Tulips, Chardonnay and Edith Wharton

My gastronomic tour through Montreal was not the only interesting eating experience I had this week. I also ate an astounding dinner in New York on Wednesday night, the night before I left for Canada.

We bought a table at Jazz for Justice, an event honoring contributors to New York's Legal Services division. It was held in the new Jazz at Lincoln Center facility which has been built into the new Time Warner building on Columbus Circle.

I had never been there but was expecting some windowless place -- either a ballroom or a concert hall with no view of anything, as per usual on the charity dinner circuit.

I was wrong.



The place was cantilevered out over Columbus Circle looking straight east down Central Park South. There was a small stage in front of a glass wall about four stories high. Tables were set back along risers up four levels to the back of the space -- each riser had room for one row of about 5 tables each.

Our table was on the second riser. We looked out over the darkening circle and it was as if we were suspended in the air above the traffic swirling around the pillar on which Columbus himself sits. The art deco buildings along Central Park South drew down to the East River -- the fin de siecle apartment houses on Fifth Avenue rose off to the north behind the park. Everything we could see was old, established New York -- we were floating in a glass and steel cage over timeless Manhattan architecture.

Our rising tables were covered in cream-colored table cloths and in the center of each table was a glass vase of cream colored, yellow Dutch tulips -- the kind with feathered petals and the occasional blood red streak.

On the small stage a jazz ensemble gathered and played Take Five and that gorgonzola song (name escapes me) and any number of Dave Brubeck and Kronos Quartet tunes. An amazing female vocalist came out and sang Dizzy Gillespie and Billie Holiday and evoked the New York of the 40s.

Under each performer the park glowed dark black and the traffic streamed around the circle with the yellow glow of headlights against the asphalt. Above each performer were the five set back rows of cream colored tables with the cream yellow Dutch tulips, rising into the dark black rafters. The rafters were invisible in the dark, except for the occasional red blinking light on the back of a straw-gold spotlight aiming down to the performer, the black backdrop of the park, and the gold headlights.

Men in dark suits sat around the cream colored tables and drank pale Chardonnay. Women in gold jewelry greeted one another against the dark outline of the park and stowed beaded purses under the cream colored tulips on the tables.

Speakers came up to the glass wall to talk about the importance of continuing to fund legal services, to help those unable to hire lawyers -- people facing homelessness and destitution and ruination. People who would never have the opportunity to attend a cream-and-gold tinged dinner floating in black glass over the southwest corner of Central Park.

The atmosphere was like antique linen. Something Edith Wharton might have worn. To a party Mrs Astor might have given. To honor an orphanage or a home for runaways -- someone like Horatio Alger, perhaps.

We are lucky people.

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Will That Be All, Mademoiselle?

I just spent two days in Montreal working with our local counsel. I had never been to "Canadia" before and was unprepared for what I found.

First of all, there is hardly anyone in this country. I flew from the chaos of LaGuardia to an airport that is modern, cavernous, peaceful, silent, bright, airy and deserted. We flew over cornfields covered with large ice puddles and red barns and then landed alone on a long runway and taxi-ed to a gate at a terminal that was not serving any other planes. I walked a long way all by myself in almost total silence to customs, where there were many customs agents but no arriving passengers in line. Then I went to baggage claim and saw maybe two other people. Then walked down another long space-age hallway in silence to a long line of taxis where I was the only customer. I don't know what happened to all my fellow passengers -- they dissolved into the Corbusier-esque architecture.

No traffic on the wide open, corn-colored highway into town. No clouds in the sky. Light blue and pale yellow.

I arrived at a tall office building downtown and no-one was in the lobby. I passed a sign in the lobby that said Attention! Chute de Glace! (Attention Falling Ice). The zeal of the announcement seemed out of place in the vacant space. I rode the elevator alone.

Finally I found my colleagues -- a native Montrealer and a Lebanese-Canadian from Toronto. Also, two client reps.

The man from Montreal is more French than a Frenchman. We mainly conversed in Esperanto because it turns out that all schoolchildren in Quebec are required to be fluent in English, French and Spanish, and if in a Catholic school, now Mandarin as well. So we conversed in franglais plus spano-portuguese plus the occassional latin legal phrase (first time in my whole career that I have found "ipse dixit" or "factum" actually worth saying).

I taught him the phrase "have a cow" which is not uttered in Canada -- they say "have a bird.".

He told a story about Yo Yo Ma, the famous "sellist."

He told me the hotel I was staying in was very "eep" and "ah ehn" (hip and high end).

He said he and his wife have two daughters because they did not want "tree." If they have "an udder shilde," ee opes it is a boy.

I dared him to say the name Thelma Thedwick. ("Delma Dedwick.").

I taught him to say "Bawlmer" instead of Baltimore. I did a little Murland "Dang! I tell you what!" which amazed him.

He told me his opposing counsel had gone to an ashram in India for a month and would came back "hanging from the drapes.". This means "on his high horse" (aye orse).
Etc.

In between our language classes we ate copious amounts. Lunch was catered in and consisted of delicate cheeses on a bed of watercress, cucumber sandwiches, fruit compote and chocolate truffle cake. A receptionist came in and set our conference room table with china and linen placemats. We moved all the papers off the table and settled in for a leisurely meal. We ended with proper coffee in china cups, served to us by someone. We ate looking out the 48th floor straight across the flat Canadian plain to the West -- more pale blue and yellow.

Dinner was up the mountain in an underground french cellar. We ate about 15 tiny courses of things one can barely imagine: lobster cappucino, caesar salad mousse, almond milk with oxygen (?), chocolate ravioli in a lake of flan, ice wine, wild Canadian grasses, etc. It was fabulous. I was so stuffed at the end I had no room for cognac. We rolled down the mountain in the moonlight to my eep ah ehn 'otel.

Today we read documents in French and spoke about them to one another in Esperanto. The mental effort to read something in French and then say it out loud in Esperanto for 4 hours was stupendous. Today's view was south over the St Lawrence to a very distant mountain range -- snow covered.

For lunch we went to an Hasidic Charcuterie up the mountain called Schwartz, for "smoked meat", pickle, and a cherry soda. It is a famous dive -- linoleum floor, white tile walls, a deli counter, surly staff, and newspaper clippings on the walls from Gourmet, Conde Nast Traveler, etc. You have to loiter outside on the street for a while until the surly staff decides to let you in. The line is very long. Smoked meat is basically a hot pastrami sandwich but you will apparently be kicked out if you say that. Same if you order a coke instead of a cherry soda. I had a "smoked meat medium," cole slaw, a pickle, and a Cott's cherry soda.

After lunch we walked to a very trendy coffee shop for coffee amidst Montreal's "eep opp" crowd.

Then it was back to the office for a chocolate croissant (the size of my head) and something maybe called a pastris langelois, I'm just not sure -- round, dense flour, yellow fruit flavored custard on top (yum).

At this point, I began to quote Monty Python -- "ah! No! I couldun eet a-nudder baht if ah tried! Just one more! It's wafer thin!". "Ah! No! I weel explode!". BOOM!

Am finally back at the deserted cavernous airport waiting for the only flight of the day to Dulles. I believe I am in a food coma and plan to take a petit nap.

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